The man who would be a balloon

Okay. This is weird. I just read that this guy (pictured above), who is a NZ trucker, blew up like a balloon when he fell onto a compressed air hose that (get this) pierced his asscheek and blew air into his body (well, the article says "forced" air into his body). Can you believe it? LOL. I'm not making this shit up either. It was on Yahoo news. So it must be true. (It's like telly. Of course everything on it is real). Anyway, the guy said he slipped and fell onto the dang thing, and, as he said to a local reporter, "I had no choice but just to lay there, blowing up like a balloon." Excuse me? You had no choice but to just lay there, blowing up like a balloon? How come you didn't pull the freaking thing out of your asscheek? #justsaying

He's goes on to say that he was "blowing up like a football."

I wonder if he was talking about a pigskin football or a soccer ball?

Luckily, his friends heard his screams (was it from pain or ecstasy?) and stopped the air flow. Then took him to the hospital, where he was treated for — wait for it — terrible swelling of the colon. Well, actually the article doesn't mention the phrase "of the colon." I just thought it would make for a better read. :)